Buckshots Booby Trap

Today my neighbor "Pops" and I were out farting around in the pasture. We checked out the baby goats, speculated on when the other does would kid, and had a nice time scratching the horses. When we went to see the bees we noticed all three upper boxes on the hives had been knocked askew leaving the frames slightly exposed. I figured Buck must have knocked into them a bit or gotten nosy while sniffing for honey. I mentioned calling the beekeeper to straighten them out since I try my best not to mess with them but Pops just started fixing them. He straightened out the first one and the bees were relaxed so as he started to fix the second as I tried to fix the third. It didn't go well for me and instead of the top box sliding into place the whole stack moved. Of course the bees came out and started buzzing me, then chasing me and getting in my hair. A couple landed on my arms and face but by this time I was getting away from the hive as fast as possible. I got stung on my arm as I pulled my pony tail out and was shaking them out of my hair, then stung in the middle of my forehead as I flailed my arms like a moron and screeched like a harpy. While I was running around like a dummy Pops fixed the third box and didn't get stung at all thank grilled cheesus, but my dog Jack and I each earned ourselves a few bee induced welts. Lessons learned- Buck and I are both stupid for getting near the bees. DO NOT TOUCH the BEES!!

Spring has Sprung!

Spring is rushing in to meet me. With so many changes coming fast it's been hard to focus on the farm. It finally hit me smack in the face though when I came home to KIDS!! Holy crap they are the cutest not-out-of-my-hoohaw babies ever!! I of course invited some friends over to meet them and they proved to be the cuddliest most enchanting little goats ever! Here are some great pictures taken by my girl "S".

We named them Apple and Aja, Apple being the girl. Even though they are squish-em-til- they-squeak cute now, I know that with out training they will soon be evil on four legs that cannot be contained by fences. So let the training commence. Aja will be up for sale in a few weeks and Apples fate has yet to be decided. Taffy their super sweet and shy mommy (she was a baby that I traded for last year) has also started training as a milk goat. I must admit, she already has better manners that those two turds Rosey and Posey. Rosey and Posey have a little game they love to play called "stick your nasty foot in the bucket" and they always do it right as I'm finishing up! A few angry times I've even had the entire bucket of milk dumped on me by one of the goaty minxes! You know how in the bible the "goats" are the bad people and the christians are lambs? Well now you know why, goats can be a royal pain in the ass, even gods ass evidently. Anyhow check out these photos and appreciate the peace and quiet at your place.

The Egg-speriment

One evening while making dinner Squawk says to me "Mommy, what happens if you freeze an egg?" Of course I get excited, I love it when they ask me questions! I tell him that the egg will crack and we proceed to set up our egg-speriment.

First, we stick a banty egg in an empty yogurt cup. Why a banty egg? Because using a big egg would be wasting food that we worked hard for, duh! We left the egg in the freezer over night and came back the next day. The egg was cracked!

Awesome experiment but Squawk is full of questions. Next on his list? Will it still smash if it's frozen? I tell him to give it a whack and find out. He smashes the crap out of it and what do you know... the egg cracks and I crack up.

Changes, coming soon to a life near you...

Well, I totally deserve the worst blogger ever award. I haven't blogged in months and life's been changing so fast I don't even know where to start. I guess the beginning makes sense so here we go! I'm going to skip around a bit but it all leads to today.

My marriage has ended. What took moments to start took years to fade and we're moving on. Hence the name change of my blog "the farm wife" no longer seems appropriate or realistic. I have nothing but love for the soon to be former "hubs", even our breakup was fantastic. That being said I cannot wait until he moves off the farm. I greatly appreciate that he is so supportive and didn't just bail, but I am looking forward to (and panicking!!) the moment when I'm on my own again. I keep flashing back to how peaceful things were when it was just me and my cat in our little house. Of course that will never be the same with two kids and a crap ton of animals running around and I'm terrified that it will be a constant struggle to stay here but life's an adventure even when you're misadventuring right?

I went to Burning Man! Wow that was frickin awesome and I'm doing it again this year. Being me I over prepared for everything that I could and killed it. What I didn't plan for was meeting myself and being forced to confront my life. That being said choices were made and I regret nothing. Ok, except maybe not going sooner.

The farm is changing. The things I set in motion last year are starting to come to fruit. I reflect on the work that I did (and didn't do) last year and I see so much room for improvement. The months of serious funk that I went through and did nothing around here are really showing but I am once again feeling strong and inspired. Don't get me wrong, I still have my days when I feel bluesy and don't want to work but the spring sun is burning the fog off my life.

My blog is changing. The title change is only part of it, as I've been reading other blogs lately and I've realized the things I've held back (my kids, emotions, and snarky sense of humor) could make me a more honest blogger and human being. I looked through my previous posts and realized that though my blog is about family and farming I never show what isn't pretty (or pictures of my kids even for that matter). As it turns out life isn't perfect and the premium that I put on perfection only exists in my mind. Some of my best recipes have come from screw ups, hell, the best things in my life have come from getting in my own way and messing up my plans!

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'll try harder, laugh louder, and stop only showing you the moments that I think are perfect. This is a farm and we're all gonna step in shit sometimes right?